Mark's Web Site: A quiet place with just a bit of pretension.

I spent the weekend attending an Alternatives to Violence Project workshop at NCC in Concord. It was a very touching and moving weekend. The men there are, for the most part, on their way out of the system. Some came because they wanted the certificate to show the parole board, some came because they wanted some relief from the boredom of the tiers, and some were genuinely interested in curbing their use of violence to resolve conflicts. By the end of the weekend, I think a new community had been formed, and most of the men gained some value from it.

My experience was a bit of self revelation. I discovered that the violence I use is not physical but more verbal and emotional. I will engage in yelling matches. When I am faced with a conflict that yelling cannot resolve, then I withdraw my presence and go a different way. I learned some other techniques for transforming power that I will practice so that my voice can be heard with the passion I feel in a non-violent way.

One exercise was to write a letter to our teenage selves. Mine went,

"Dear Mark,

You have a voice, and it counts. Even though others may speak with more confidence, or they may speak louder, or they may speak faster - you have a voice and it counts. When you want to defer to another point of view, even though you believe it to be wrong, you must remember - you have a voice, and it counts. When you speak your heart you make it a little bit better. When you speak your soul, you can change the world. You have a voice, and it counts."